I will have had the chance to go out with 3 relatively normal virgins (including Eye Doctor) in the last 3 months. I have only dated one other virgin in my life, so it’s been a good year so far, sort of.
Catholic men are awful to date. They’re bad in a different way than the regular crop of attractive losers I manage to go out with.
I ran across a profile of a seemingly normal, professional guy on Bumble (don’t judge me). He was an investment banker and nearby. Normally I would’ve been on the fence about swiping right, because he seemed kind of vanilla, except he mentioned he was Christian. We matched and began texting back and forth for a good 24 hours. In our conversations he said a few things that sort of mad me cringe, but I chalked it up to lost in translation. He called me out on “going too far” but asking if he’d be single for 6 months after gleaning some info off his Instagram. He also said after learning about my love for pets “Let me be clear, if we were to to hit it off and get married (whoa, chill man) our house would not be a zoo.” Ok, both somewhat orange flags in the way he felt it appropriate to dictate to or call me out on things before we even met.
After more chatting, it turned out we both worked for the same company at one point, and were even working out of the same office, despite the fact he now lives in Chicago (the problem with people traveling and Bumble matching base on current location, not home location). It also turned out he was a devout practicing, conservative Catholic who was waiting until marriage to have sex. Wow. This guy’s appeal skyrocketed. He travels back and forth to Boston from Chicago every other week, so we agreed to meet up the following weekend.
After waiting around a Starbucks for 5 hours, he texted to let me know his delayed plane finally landed. I agreed to meet him at the hotel where he was staying and walk across the street for dinner. By that time, it was late and I was already somewhat disinterested. However he insisted on dinner, so we went to a very expensive steakhouse where he proceeded to order a 3 course meal. We chatted and came to realize that we had much in common: from politics to religion, and a general world view. I didn’t find myself attracted to him though, even though he was a decent looking guy. I left the date thinking, If he asks me out again, I’ll go.
The next day I was busy with work and not exactly enamored with the idea of dating this virgin after our date. I didn’t hear from him until that night when he sent me a text saying, “You’ve been quiet all day…”
What the hell? We went on one date. He never set up a second date. But he’s expecting me to be clambering at the chance to communicate immediately? I replied saying, “I could say the same about you” which quickly escalated the conversation to a roundabout argument. He finally said, “Let’s agree not to be petty.”
Forget it. I know this type. I’ve dated him before. He’s self righteous and thinks way too highly of himself. He believes just because he’s making good money and has his spiritual life together, he’s some huge catch. To him I say: “Look, I know that your virginity is gift to your future wife, but it’s not a prize I have to earn.” He’s the type that never would fight for a relationship. He’s the type who believes that things should be 50/50, not putting in 100% and doing whatever it takes. The sheer fact he didn’t feel it necessary to pursue me after one date, and I instead should be falling all over him, says enough. Big whoop. You took me on one date, which, by the way, I realize you paid for on your company credit card.